Application #12: Bill Garrett
FIRST PLACE

(mainly because he's the only one with the shape-shifting cloak!)

1. Why do you want to be a Warder?

Service and Honor. I enjoy the satisfaction of serving a noble cause (the Light, after all!) and the prestige that accrues from such a position.

Also, I like to beat things up.

2. Why do you want to be my Warder?

The streets of Washington are dangerous at night, and worse things than Fades and Trollocs (particularly of the Ho'yas tribe) are known to prowl the ways. You need someone familiar with the territory and these malevolent denizens.

Or, to put it more succintly, because you asked.

3. Have you ever previously been a Warder?

No, but I'm sure there's some relevant experience somewhere in my CV. Maybe that paper route I had back when I was 12... nasty shadowhounds lurking the neighborhood.

4. Do you own a sword?

The longest I have is a Turkish sword (18" serpentine blade, wolfshead grip) but I have a few knives, and a lance (retractable). Oh, and a quarterstaff. But I've always wanted a sword. Better reach than a dagger, sharper than a staff.

5. Do you own a color-shifting cape (NOTE: I will not supply this, you must find one on your own!)?

Actually, I do own a longcoat of a grayish-green color that tends to mix into the background.

6. What is your favorite color?

Azure. (brilliant blue w/ a tinge of green)

7. Do you believe that the person you are bonded to should be obeyed in every and all ways?

Absolutely. The idea of bondage has always appealed to me. Dominate me.

8. Write an essay on what being a Warder means to you. This essay must be 1500 words or less.

Voice over: Lincoln Warder Institute will train YOU with the skills YOU need to become a successful warder serving the Light. In only 4 months YOU will learn how to: fight with weapons, sense shadowspawn, spot your Aes Sedai with your eyes closed, adopt a stoic disposition, and speak tersely if at all. Just listen to what THESE successful students have to say...

Testimonial 1: When I graduated from high school, I was headed for a nowhere career flipping burgers at the local tavern. But Lincoln Warder Institute taught me the skills I needed to become a successful warder. I learned self discipline, self- confidence, and martial arts. Now I'm bonded to a sister of the Blue Ajah and I enjoy a new career travelling around Randland fighting the Dark!

Testimonial 2: I always wanted to be a warder, and I thought that my years of practice, study, and careful grooming would suffice in the real world. Hah, I couldn't even get my foot in the door of the White Tower. But the Lincoln Warder Institute got me the connections I needed to find a satisfying life bonded to a Green sister. Why, all 4 of my sister-brothers are from Lincoln, too!

Voice over: DON'T be left behind when the day of Tarmon Gaidon comes; be at the vanguard of the attack by enrolling in Lincoln Warder Institute right now. Classes form every 3 weeks and financial aid is available to those who qualify. Give us a call and get the tools you need to unlock YOUR future! Not affiliated with CBS.

prev up next

HTML by Bill Garrett
garrett@cs.unc.edu